Unavoidably detained by the world

salparadisewasright:

estufar:

An actual headline from The New York Times in 1919 

salparadisewasright:

estufar:

An actual headline from The New York Times in 1919 

The Simpsons: Last Night’s Super Weird Couch Gag — Vulture

God, I love Don Hertzfeldt. This is both totally bizarre and strangely touching.

annaxiin:

4:00 PM
(you never sleep regularly anymore.)

annaxiin:

4:00 PM

(you never sleep regularly anymore.)

Share my house

Hello, my name is Derek. I am a 24 year old male searching for someone to keep me company in my spacious historic home. The estate, Schoffield Manor, came into my possession months ago through an inheritance. Schoffield Manor is an eight bedroom farm house built in 1921. The house offers countless elegant views as it sits on 50 acres of beautiful country landscape, so much that I often find myself lonely. I am hoping to find an interesting companion to fill this void that the estate creates. We could watch movies, cook dinners, or go for long walks on the property.

I probably should have stated this outright first, but applicants should be open minded because this house has another unconventional occupant. In months here at Schoffield Manor I have become acquainted with a spectre of a previous tenant. Through numerous encounters I have learned this visitor is the visiant of a German man named Klaus Eichmann. Don’t worry, he immigrated here in 1908 as a child so he’s not into that Nazi funny business. Klaus does have a small quirk. He often asks people to play schnitzel with him, but never elaborates on what that is. It shouldn’t be a big deal since he visits infrequently, but I wouldn’t indulge in his requests. I have attached a sketch of Klaus to give you an idea of what he looks like.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. If you are interested, shoot me an email. Again, all that is required is an open mind.

Pretty sure Shirley Jackson wrote this Craigslist ad.

I cried over beautiful things knowing no beautiful thing lasts.

Carl Sandburg, from section “Autumn Movement” of “Redhaw Winds,” Poetry (October 1918)

(Source: fables-of-the-reconstruction)

Watch This Amazing Fan-Made ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ Animated Intro

This is so good. Universe of nothing but shrimp!

“Some sexy stuff,” says pseudonym, not his/her real name because he/she is the writer’s friend on Facebook, a vague professional from a major city. “Less sexy but necessary follow-up to make the above sexy quote make sense.”

Transition from the lede: pseudonym is not alone; the writer has seen not one, not two, but exactly three examples of this would-be trend online. (The last one is a stretch.)

Buzzword, buzzword, buzzword. Isn’t the buzzword on your mind now? Perhaps it is on other people’s minds? Read on or you’ll be clueless, dated, and without any friends in the world. Buzzword again!